Connection, Connection, Connection — What’s The Fuss REALLY All About

Filed under: Copywriting — Shaune on Thursday, October 19, 2006

Today I’ve received three great emails, that in one way or another, mention “The Power of Connection,” a topic I can’t talk enough about.

Why?

It’s so important at the core of who we are as people.

As humans we innately want connection… authentic, human connection. It’s something indescribable really, but you certainly can feel it when it’s present and you can definitely feel that something is missing when it’s not there.

It’s an integral part of the buying process, especially today when force-fed sales messages are being so quickly disregarded.

When a copywriter is a real customer for the product they are writing copy for, the copy is much more intimate, much more powerful, and the response is so much higher.

They truly feel for the customer. They truly understand what’s going on for them and, without the copywriter saying so, the reader can feel that. They feel a connection and from that connection trust is generated. That trust reduces resistance and supports their decision to buy.

Note that I said it supports the decision to buy. It doesn’t create it — there are other factors — but when the decision to buy is getting closer, trust generated through connection will help put them over the edge in feeling “Okay” to make that purchase.

Connection comes in many forms, it even comes in false forms. Somehow we can just feel when it’s authentic and when it’s not. In the case of copy, we can feel like we’re being sold to or that we’re being guided to a purchasing decision.

One feels great, the other… Not so much. : )

I’ll stop there. I’m going to ask that those that emailed me post their comments here for all to see.

Shaune

16 Comments - I want to hear your opinion. Click here to leave a comment.

Comment by Shaune's Mother

October 19, 2006 @ 6:44 pm

Speaking of connection, I just received this email from my Mother…

Yes, it would be nice for you to be able to speak more often, but maybe with this new thing with Alan you’ll have the opportunity??

You’ve come a long way from speaking with Darryl Wolfe in Burnside park and going to NY in a beat up ole’ car.

I went to your blog. Nice to read all the nice comments about MY SON.

I actually tried to send a comment but it said my email address was invalid??? or was it a website, that I don’t have?? sorry but I tried.

This is how it was going to read:
–––––––––––––––––––––
My dear Shaune,

Can you remember our trip to NY in the early 90’s? We ran out of gas just before we got to the US border. We were trying to make it to the cheaper gas. Darn that steep hill !!

Thank goodness for the ‘neighbor’who always had a jug of gas on hand for the next victim. You were game for anything then and you still are.

You delivered fantastic seminars 15 plus years ago and plenty since - you’re a natural !!!

Can’t wait to see the video.

CONGRATULATIONS on your UK success,
LOVE from YOUR Proud MOTHER
––––––––––––––––––––––––

Feel free to put it on your blog if you can.

Love ya lots,
Your MOTHER
xoxoxoxo

—————————
A baby is a bit of heaven come to earth.
—————————-

347

Comment by Cheri Nikkel

October 19, 2006 @ 7:29 pm

Hi Shaune,

I’ll jump in.

The importance of trust really does seem to be a hot topic. Today I received an email from Chris Attwood at HealthyWealthyNWise about The Speed of Trust - a new book by Stephen M.R. Covey.

Chris held a teleseminar with Mr. Covey about the role of trust. About how who does and doesn’t trust you affects every area of your life. Comments included “phenomenal” and “ground-breaking”.

One comment really caught my eye. It was about “the tax we pay when our relationships lack trust and the dividends we gain from high trust relationships”

It reminded me of how you speak of “putting deposits in the emotional bank account” by really caring about the customer. By showing empathy in our writing. In my mind, it’s another form of building trust. That’s why it’s so powerful.

Amazon has a review of this book by Publisher’s Weekly’s. It says, “Covey outlines 13 behaviors of trust-inspiring leaders, such as demonstrating respect, creating transparency, righting wrongs, delivering results and practicing accountability.”

It sounds a little like the sales process… Demonstrate respect/create transparency (Creating a connection through honest understanding and empathy), righting wrongs (being honest about any of our product’s failings) delivering results (offering a product of value), and practicing accountability (having a great guarantee)

I’m not sure what extra insight the book will have, if any. But it’s just another confirmation that ‘how’ we connect is oh, so important.

If Alan’s seminar is any indication, you’re in the right place, at just the right time.

Better hang on, it’s going to be quite a ride!

Cheri

348

Comment by Shaune

October 19, 2006 @ 8:31 pm

Yes there are some similarities to building trust and building your emotional bank account. I’d say that when I speak of it it’s more temporary — in that current conversation — whereas the actual building of trust is something that lasts.

Not that you don’t build it up — the emotional bank account — over time it’d just that in the context of how I speak of it it’s at a higher level… “in-the-moment.”

Interesting term — transparent.

Thats How Jerry Hart described me — he was a speaker at Alan’s event — He was referring to the fact that I wasn’t hiding that I had something to sell — a hidden agenda.

In fact one key point in the presentation was when I let them know that both Stephen Pierce and Jerry Hart had agreed to have me interview them.

Making the point about how it gives instant access to influential people I said,

“It took less than a minute. Now don’t you think — then I lowered my voice to a whisper — that I might just be workin’ towards a joint venture with these guys.

The crowd loved it. I was “revealing” what was really going on. To Jerry, it too, was me being transparent. I wasn’t creating a relationship on false pretense.

I’m hangin’ on for sure.

: )

Thanks Cheri,

Shaune

349

Comment by Ethan Kap

October 19, 2006 @ 10:42 pm

Shaune:

You always continue to impress! Your comments on “being transparent” really struck a chord with me.

I learned the hard way not being transparent. 10 months ago I started a business and I did not have an affinity with my marketplace. Sadly, I felt I had to hide behind my copy. A big mistake.

People were skeptical of what I had to offer and sales were depressed…

Then I met Shaune. I remember the day I called him. It left an indellible mark upon me. He spent 30 minutes of his value time answering my questions…He was totally tranparent!

Quicky I knew he had something that I wanted and enrolled in his copywriting program.

I have never regreted that decision. I have totally revamped my copy and became 100% transparent to my customers. Shaune’s approach and style changed my business.

For that Shaune I will forever be indebted. Thanks! You made the connnection with me and taught me the value of creating that connection with my customers.

Ethan Kap

350

Comment by Cheri Nikkel

October 19, 2006 @ 10:54 pm

Very interesting. So tell me, what would you guys say is the key to being transparent? Is it just being honest, or is it more than that?

351

Comment by Terri

October 19, 2006 @ 11:05 pm

I believe I’ll jump in with my opinion on this one. Shaune’s transparency is not just in being honest. He also informs the audience of his intentions. They know the path he’s leading them down. Step by step.

And they’re willing to join him on the journey. The reason? He’s let them in on where he’s going. By the time he’s “closing” the sale, they’re already on board. He hasn’t snuck up on them.

During the time I was in his coaching program, he informed me that I was “sneaking up” on the audience in my copy. The lesson stayed with me, and now I can recognize the abruptness of a “sneaky sale” as opposed to a transparent offer.

Shaune is transparent. It’s a wonderful skill and trait.

352

Comment by Kathy

October 20, 2006 @ 8:16 am

It’s funny because Cheri mentions Covey’s latest book…I hadn’t thought of him for a while but his “7 Habits of Highly Effective People” was referenced in a book I’m reading right now, “You’ve Got to Read This Book!” by Jack Canfield and Gay Hendricks. It’s an engaging compilation of the books that have most influenced the lives of some notable people who have made an impact in the world.

“7 Habits” was the life-changing book of one of these people and she mentions how the most powerful part was when Covey asks you to envision your own funeral. What would people say about you? What kind of friend, sister, daughter, neighbor were you? He finishes up by saying “Begin with the end in mind.”

If we begin with the end in mind and do the hard work of focusing on others instead of constantly on ourselves (easier said than done), then connections are a natural outgrowth of that. We’re always reaching out as opposed to focusing inwardly.

So one way of looking at transparency is that it occurs when your outward actions match your inner self and there are no barriers or hidden agendas between you and the rest of the world. Popeye’s “I Yam what I Yam” in a very good way!

353

Comment by Cheri

October 20, 2006 @ 11:02 am

“When your outward actions match your inner self, and there are no hidden agendas.” That’s really good, Kathy.

Terri, it sounds like it’s another “gift” Shaune has. Watching it unfold before your eyes must have been incredible!

So Shaune, when you’re up there on stage, you’re trying to create that connection with your audience. To show them a little of who you are. I’m seeing it as a process, a building up of trust between you and the audience. Once you get that connection - you can actually feel it - you then build on it, reveal more of yourself and your intentions, build more rapport, reveal more… which would be why they call it “working the crowd”. Is the right?

354

Comment by Andrew Jaronski

October 20, 2006 @ 11:07 am

Hi everyone,

It’s true.

There’s nothing like full-on, genuine, nothing-held-back connection.

The sincerity that comes with this can’t be faked. People will see through you in a second.

Ever feel that prickly barrage of hidden agendas when you read a wandering piece of long copy? You might grumble, “What does this guy want from me?” and scan to the end (if you stay that long) just to get it over with.

Same goes for live presentations.

A couple of weeks ago, I had the rare privilege of hearing Janet Attwood speak in person. Co-author with her ex-husband Chris Attwood of “The Passion Test”, Janet was fun and invigorating. She freely gave away copies of her book to audience members courageous enough to join her on stage.

We all knew she was there to promote her book. Throughout her presentation, she was devoid of any pretense or hidden agendas. (And we weren’t made to feel guilty if we didn’t buy her book!)

The letdown came with the second speaker. From the get-go, we could feel the tug of “hidden agenda”. She built her presentation in a vague Tony Robbins sort of way and mentioned how she rarely came to these events. (The direct implication being we should consider ourselves lucky to be in her royal presence. Don’t worry, she wasn’t a princess even though she has been on Oprah!)

Following this vague insult, she went into how we were in attendance for a reason and that she’s deeply discounting her seminar. (The other very expensive shoe finally drops.)

I guess she figured slather us with some false flattery and we were ready to be toasted.

Not many people bought it. Why? She failed to make a connection.

Though more seasoned and perhaps more successful, speaker number two didn’t even come close to the genuine charisma of Janet Attwood.

Janet - like Shaune - really loves what she does. And it shows.

P.S. Shaune: do you have any video tidbits of your UK presentation for us to enjoy?

371

Comment by Terri

October 21, 2006 @ 2:54 pm

Andrew!

How the heck are ya?

If I may ask…was the connection w/Janet enough to make people buy, or did she have an effective sales presentation as well?

P.S. (I’ve read her book)

373

Comment by Andrew Jaronski

October 22, 2006 @ 6:09 pm

You know what Terri?

If Janet had a sales presentation, it was so smooth that I didn’t notice it! Whatever it was, people lined up to buy MULTIPLE copies of her book. (I already had my copy from months ago and got it signed.)

P.S. (Have you seen “The Secret”?) Feel free to email me.

375

Comment by Brett Kitchen

October 22, 2006 @ 11:28 pm

In the spirit of being totally honest I have to make this point…

It concerns me to some degree about all this “Feel Good” connection stuff at the expense of Results. I mean cash sales.

It’s great to “Connect” But is that connection turning in to results? I know Shaune’s experience in the UK was a good example of connection + results.

I was on a site the other day where the guy was talking about humanizing the Internet. It reminded me of how you had used that term in a conversation Shaune and I had earlier in the week.

This guy was explaining how when he was sitting in the audience at a semianr he was speaking at he could feel the audience cringe as the pitch started to come.

He went on to say that he connected with his audience and they cheered and applauded as he kicked out the Elephant in the room… Which was the sales pitch.

When he ended he got a standing O and later mentioned he did get some sales…but at what cost, because he never had an offer or a close.

How many people could REALLY benefit from buying his product, that didn’t because he didn’t have an offer or a close.

I mean we should all feel passionate about what we’re selling and the results it offers to our audience / buyers.

If this is truly the case, (as it is with me) then it is my OBLIGATION to get what I’m selling into their hands. I need to make sales and help people get thier hands on what I have to offer.

If someone hadn’t done the same for me, I’d still be stuck in a really crummy job situation.

So that’s my two cents… Don’t let “good idea’s” and “philosophy” ruin results.

377

Comment by Shaune Clarke

October 23, 2006 @ 1:01 am

Brett, you make a great point.

Here’s my take…

I think it’s a blend. Connection is one piece… one piece of a sales presentation. For sure, you still sell.

Here’s how I like to say it. Most of the time when someone is reading a piece of copy they are feeling sold and are resistant to that.

I want them to know they’re being sold and be okay with that.

If you’re real — if you connect — if you empathize and are understanding, just like in an interview you earn points for your emotional bank account.

When your points are high, you can then afford a withdrawal and make a close — that close should be a REAL offer and create a REAL sense of urgency — not something fabricated.

Also, the close should be almost automatic — the presentation should educate and bring the prospect around to “I want that.”

Of course it really helps when you have a completely unique product with lots of great content. Then you can afford to give away a taste yet leave the customers knowing you have much more to offer.

I say you can do both — connect and close — and make more sales.

Shaune

PS: There was a video taken of the event Andrew. I will have a clip of my presentation. It will be another couple of weeks before it’s ready but when it is you can bet I’ll be making it available.

Anyone who would like to see it should email me at shaune@dynamicresponsemarketing.com and let me know.

378

Comment by Ethan Kap

October 23, 2006 @ 8:32 am

Shaune:

I understand now how you can do both — connect and close. However, the true mystery to me is how you “want them to know they’re being sold and be okay with that.”

That is the 1,000,000 dollar question!

How do you create that mood in the audience right from the start? Most times when I know I’m being sold from the get-go, I am much more resistent.

Then after you have created that mood, how do you continue to leave the audience in that mood until your close?

Ethan

Ethan

379

Comment by Terri

October 23, 2006 @ 10:05 am

If I may interject a brief point….

Personally, I can’t wait to see the video of Shaune’s presentation.

For sure there is a need for “humanizing” the internet and the sales process.I do believe it’ll
become the new “buzz” in sales generation.

But what I had NEVER seen before was a crowd informed of the fact that they were being sold to..and absolutely loving it every step of the way.

I’d never seen it before, that is, until the London trip.

It was mutual reciprocity, with Shaune feeding the audience, and them giving it right back 100 times over. It’s not just emphasizing connection, it’s actually doing it.

That’s better than buzz. That’s “feeling” it.

You’ve gotta see it to believe it.

380

Comment by Ryan Healy

October 23, 2006 @ 11:38 am

Whether your copy is overt or covert should depend on the source of “traffic.”

For instance, if someone is searching for a particular phrase like “Viking stainless steel refrigerator,” it’s important that your site be clear and announce that the prospect has indeed found what he is looking for. It should simply make the sale in a direct fashion.

In a magazine, it is quite different. You must stop someone from flipping the page and get him to read your pitch. In this case, it’s better to be covert.

Connection happens when you figure out what your prospect is thinking about. As Robert Collier said, you must enter the conversation that’s already happening in your prospect’s mind. That’s connection.

RSS feed for comments on this post. TrackBack URI

Sorry, the comment form is closed at this time.